For many Christians, praying with their family can be an intimidating thing to do. My father was a man of few words, and though he and Mom taught me to pray as a child, it was only in the later years of his life that I really felt at ease praying with him. I wish I’d found the courage sooner.
Learning to pray with the people we love can be a challenge, but “we will reap a harvest if we do not give up” (Galatians 6:9).
But praying with our families is always worth the effort because it “brings home” the power and presence of God.
We all must work at encouraging prayer in our families; it’s an aspect of family life where there is always room to grow.
God wants you to pray together, and as you keep trying He will help you learn ways of praying that will work for your personal situation.
We all must work at encouraging prayer in our families; it’s an aspect of family life where there is always room to grow. God is merciful and accepts our efforts no matter how steep the learning curve may be. He works with us where we are and will always make a way.
Praying with Your Children
Jesus said that “a prophet is not without honour except in his own town, among his relatives and in his own home” (Mark 6:4).
Any parents who have tried to sit down and pray with their teenagers can relate to those words! Our faults are right out there for all to see, and there never seems to be a right time to do it.
1. Ease Prayer into Existing Routines
The easiest way to begin is to quietly ease prayer into existing routines. When are you sitting quietly together for a moment during the day?
Think about the natural rhythms of your life together and ask God to show you those times where you can gently introduce a few moments to pray.
Our family kept a book of Bible verse promises and a daily “flip” calendar with verses beside the dinner table. After thanking God for our food, we’d pray briefly about whatever promise we chose for the day.
Think about the natural rhythms of your life together and ask God to show you those times where you can gently introduce a few moments to pray.
Other times we would wait until the end of the meal and then share the verse and pray about whatever we had talked about over dinner.
Many families say a memorised prayer at bedtime when their children are little. As kids grow, you can add a few moments to thank God for something that happened during the day or to check in about what is happening the next day (followed by a few moments to pray about it).
Keeping a family prayer journal is another great way to show God’s faithfulness in answering prayer and involve children as they grow. Any notebook will do. Write down what you prayed about and then leave room to write down the answer later. As you write down the answers God gives, take time to thank and praise Him for what He’s done.
Prayers that take longer to answer give you a chance to talk about God’s perfect wisdom and how He always answers prayer, even if He says no or wait.
Prayers that take longer to answer give you a chance to talk about God’s perfect wisdom and how He always answers prayer, even if He says no or wait. But keep teaching moments brief so that shorter attention spans are able to keep up.
Likewise, our own prayers with children should be frequent, but not lengthy. If children are taught to see prayer as an exciting and special meeting time with God, they’ll be drawn to it.
2. Be Spontaneous
In a society where families spend less time together than ever before, learning how to pray together helps you stay closer. The time doesn’t have to be long—even three minutes can make a difference and bring blessings that would never have occurred otherwise.
Praying together spontaneously is part of God’s design for family life. God tells us to “impress” His Word upon our children “when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up” (Deuteronomy 6:7).
The less rehearsed and more frequent prayer is, the easier it will be to sustain.
Prayer shouldn’t be only at set times; it should be part of the natural flow of the day. The less rehearsed and more frequent prayer is, the easier it will be to sustain.
By weaving God’s promises and prayer into the day, we please Him and walk closer with Him.
3. Watch and Pray
Paul advised the early Christians in Ephesus to make “the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil” (Ephesians 5:16).
The spiritual challenges families face today require parents to be more proactive than ever. Because the devil does not sleep, our homes need the security system of God’s watchful power to answer prayer.
Because the devil does not sleep, our homes need the security system of God’s watchful power to answer prayer.
We make “the most of every opportunity” with our children by keeping in step with the Spirit and by staying in prayer ourselves.
Let your children “catch” you praying on your own. Pray with them when you hear a siren (for the people who need help and for the people helping them). Pray when you drive by your church or a homeless person or an accident.
When your children are afraid, pray with them about whatever their concern may be. When they are happy, point to God and use it as a chance to thank and praise Him. When someone in the family is sick, pray for healing together. Be bold and be creative, and trust God to meet you as you step forward in faith.
Read Part 2 of this two-part series on how we can start praying with those we love.
Extracted and adapted from Praying Together, published by Discovery House Publishers © 2016 by James Banks.