One of my biggest fears as a parent was whether I could disciple my children so that they would become disciples of Christ themselves.
Could I equip my sons to nurture their personal relationships with Jesus and develop healthy and holy relationships with others? Could I prepare them to become responsible stewards of their God-given gifts? Could I help them recognise their value as members of the body of Christ? Or, would they leave the church when they transitioned out of the youth ministry?
One of our most important God-given responsibilities as parents is the discipleship of our children. Yet the pressures of social competition and unrealistic expectations can tempt us to demand immediate spiritual maturity from them, even as we declare ourselves to be works-in-progress.
Give Us This Day #8
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It’s easy to forget that developing disciples is a lifetime process that requires us to continually plant and water seeds of truth while trusting God to bring forth the fruit of the Spirit in our children’s lives.
The pressures of social competition and unrealistic expectations can tempt us to demand immediate spiritual maturity.
In my efforts to prevent my children from making the same mistakes I made, I got a little too comfortable preaching from my homemade pulpit instead of taking a seat next to them in the pew.
Fear caused me to worry and make the mistake of lecturing my sons on what they should or shouldn’t do.
This tactic got old when they figured out I wasn’t as perfect as I wanted them to be. When I learned to apologise to my children and be honest about my need for God, I found I could help them understand God’s Word better. Instead of just insisting that they memorise Bible verses, I was able to help them apply God’s truth to their daily lives.
Lecturing without learning to listen to our children stunts our communication and can damage our relationships with those we love most. Facing my faults, I could see why parents are reminded to avoid exasperating our children and encouraged to “bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4).
So, what can a parent do?
Discipleship is Letting God Take Over
Our journey begins with our own personal encounters with Jesus, which can prepare us for a lifestyle devoted to discipleship.
When Jesus found Philip, one of the original twelve disciples, He said, “Follow me” (John 1:43). Philip responded in obedience and immediately started pointing others towards Jesus (vv.44-45).
When his friend, Nathanael, had questions about Jesus’s identity, Philip didn’t offer a sermon or insist he recite Scripture. He didn’t get angry or try to bully his friend into belief. Instead, he simply invited Nathanael to “come and see” for himself, to interact with Jesus on an intimate level (v.46). He then stepped aside and gave God room to work in his friend’s heart.
He trusted that the Lord would reveal himself to his seeking friend, just as He had revealed himself to Philip.
Scripture introduces us to a second Philip, one of the church members chosen to serve in leadership and known as the Evangelist. This Philip also used a hands-on, hands-off approach to evangelism and discipleship when the Lord led him to a divine appointment with a travelling seeker (Acts 8:26-40).
Philip didn’t offer a sermon or insist Nathanael recite Scripture . . . he simply invited Nathanael to “come and see” for himself, to interact with Jesus on an intimate level.
Upon hearing an Ethiopian reading the Book of Isaiah, Philip refrained from lecturing and instead engaged the man in conversation (v.30). When the seeker asked for help interpreting the words, Philip “began with that very passage of Scripture and told him the good news about Jesus” (v.35).
The Evangelist then stepped aside, allowing the man to respond to the Holy Spirit and ask to be baptised (v.36).
Though our parental roles are lifetime commitments, we can still follow the examples set by the apostle Philip and Philip the Evangelist. We can point our children to Jesus as revealed in the Scriptures, welcome questions about interpretation and life application, and trust the Holy Spirit to mould their malleable hearts.
As we commit to discipleship at home and live our lives fully depending on Christ, our children will be watching, listening, wondering, and learning.
God will give us opportunities to guide them and grow with them as we invite them to live by faith with us. We can depend on the Lord to transform our children—and us—as we equip and encourage them to be good stewards of their God-given resources while serving as vital members of the body of Christ.
Discipleship is Getting Children Involved
While many churches set aside specific days to celebrate young people, we often fail to view them as whole individuals chosen by God to be members of the church.
Underestimating the role of children in the church can hinder us from recognising and appreciating the unique perspectives and contributions they can bring.
If we embrace the idea that discipleship is a progressive journey, we can prepare our children to step up as faithful and responsible stewards of the resources God has entrusted to them.
With gentle supervision and guidance to both protect and inspire them, children can become contributing members of the church, no matter their age.
Toddlers can pray, help with cleaning up, pass out bulletins, and team up with adults to serve as greeters. Children can create artwork for bulletin covers or signs for various ministries. They can serve alongside adults as singers and dancers during praise and worship, help fill food baskets, serve people during holiday meals, and even team up with adults to visit housebound or hospitalised church members.
Older children can read to senior citizens or younger children, help set up and clean worship areas, or decorate the church for camps.
Teens can organise and serve at various ministry events, help manage the church’s social media accounts, work with the multimedia department, or serve in the church office after school or during the holidays.
With gentle supervision and guidance to both protect and inspire them, children can become contributing members of the church, no matter their age.
When children are given age-appropriate opportunities to interact as complete individuals and use their God-given gifts to build up the body of Christ, they can take ownership of their faith journey, practise perseverance, and grow closer to God and others.
We can support these young members of our church family by listening to them, respecting their opinions, and acknowledging their contributions to the body of Christ.
We can encourage them to communicate with God through prayer, apply scriptural truths, and recognise their spiritual growth.
We can help them develop their own faith by allowing them to work things out themselves and by sharing how God is helping us grow in Christ-likeness.
As children begin to see themselves as valuable and interdependent members of the body of Christ, they can exercise their faith and experience God’s life-transforming power for themselves through childhood into the teen years and beyond.
Discipleship is Empowerment, Encounters, and Experience
Our children learn best through their personal encounters with God instead of through our mini-sermons.
God will prepare them for the paths He’s paved for them, as individuals and as members of the body of Christ. They can make a difference in their communities with courage and confidence as they walk in the power of the Holy Spirit.
Our children learn best through their personal encounters with God instead of through our mini-sermons.
As we invest in these young disciples, we can all experience the power of Christ in us. We can spread God’s truth and love to the ends of the earth, knowing that each person is a vital and valuable part of God’s beautifully diverse church (Ephesians 4:1-16).
Godly training requires us to put our faith into practice. As we trust the Lord to transform us and our children, we can come alongside them and learn to live as disciples of Christ together.
